When your life disappears before the eyes of truth, would you able to define truth?
John Keats: “Beauty is truth, truth beauty but what is beauty, and what is truth?”
Theodore “Ted” Lonzo Baran, Chief for Department of Public Safety (DPS) at Gallaudet University.
Three years ago today on November 8th, death came before my life and floated dead for ten minutes, it might be the longest ten minutes even if life was motionless. Death by default seemed to me, as I experienced, brutally unfair. Death is fail-safe predictor; Truth is a fail-safe predictor;
The central idea was simple: Truth would reveal itself, as Ted would sink to the bottom of the toilet, and only the guilt would drown truth.
The oppression, hatred, and norms, have been floating around Baran’s wings, while values, higher learning, and motivated hate-solving bullying have taken center stage on the Gallaudet University campus. The corrupt abuse of power. Gallaudet University as a safe place? Baran would make lives harder.
For the last 25 years, I had been working hard to change my life around. I took a lot of detours, struggles, death threats, going through the toughest road ahead, proving myself to the highest standards, and yet, when I moved to Washington, D.C. to begin my graduate school on a full scholarship possibly best moment and Gallaudet University was supposed to heal;
As I remember that day when I came into DPS headquarters, I informed Ted Baran of my responsibility, the first words Ted said: “That’s you. I can kick you out of Gallaudet University if I want to.” abusing his power and that begun the hatred right there. I never see something like this.
Ted “forced” me to stand upfront of graduate classrooms, presentations, workshops, anywhere on the campus to explain why I was jailed every day or I face extreme punishment like expelled from Gallaudet University.
The corrupt abuse of power. I was shocked by his threats. I refused to be profiled. That would lead to death threats, bullying, suicide and it is not healthy at all. Gallaudet University was supposed to be a place of healing. No one wanted to hear my stories. Baran got away. Is there a legal step for abusing power? Who would be the criminal in this picture?
Envision the scene: Baran has been strolling around the campus with abuse of power.
When I woke up from death, I had been targeted off the charges, hoping I’d taste my own execution by toxic culture. Facing the legal punishment of death is the most invisible reason, to inquire about the abuse of power by Baran.
I remember when I was on the stretcher recovering from a massive heart attack on the world’s most sacred ground of the Deaf, Several of Deaf people were cheering along with hands waving, while I put my thumbs up signaling that I’m all right and strong. Ted Baran was walking by and gave me a nasty look. I really remember that face that day. Whisking by. Like he was chuckling in his own head. Oh yeah, the weakness of a CODA who has a hatred for Deaf life. Not true CODA.
I wish I’d do something quickly to react by giving Ted my middle finger. I’d do it in a heartbeat. Everything went fast. Again, I’d give Ted Baran, “FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCK!” and I never have gotten the chance to do that, I blew that. Why didn’t I do that?
After I got out of the hospital, two days later, decide to visit Gallaudet University and showed up at DPS office to thank someone else there for dedication with open-minded, bumped into Ted with close-minded, being the better person, and I see that the hatred still floating in his body, mind, and soul. I was glad it was not Ted who attempting to save my life because he would not do his job and let my breath run out on his own watch. Like getting away with murder.
Last March 2019, there was a play about Deaf people in Hitler’s Europe held at George Washington University (GWU), where the story was about targeting Deaf Jewish people, shaming them in the name of hate, scarlet letter on their foreheads, and living with the labels. Lifetime scars. Emotional well-being. Mental. Psychical. Just like “JEWISH” on their passports, dealing with the hate spectrum.
Ted Baran and I bumped into each other there, before the play begins, it is clear that play story had been inspiring Ted’s egoism, his abuse of power, and hatred. He loved the story idea about the abuse of power, killing their souls; He supported the hate machine. He was a perfect example.
Convo event: He showed up in DPS white uniform on Saturday evening;
Convo attire: Look good and be YOU.
I was there wearing an enamel pin: REJECT HATE. That was the symbol of truth. Coming back from death that day, it makes me stronger than ever and will continue to show the truth. It was to break the evil spell. At that moment, I felt free but also exhausted and completely alive all at the same time.
That day, November 8, 2016: I asked an important question in front of the audience in SAC 1011 before my last breath, after I woke up from death, I realized that Gallaudet University was aiding and abetting Baran’s hatred. Same cloth. Same oath.
Remember Convo dress attire? BE YOU.
Baran wearing white uniform making a statement that he is above the abuse of power, white privileges, hearing privileges, and commander-in-hater, he does not need to dress up like this. Be YOU. Be casual.
Behind the badge, and that was what makes Ted’s skull are met with.
Copyright © 2019 Jason Tozier
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